Dads

Is being a husband much easier than being a dad? Sometimes, I feel being just the former could be a lot simpler. For example, without prejudice to any class of people, sometimes you could successfully pretend that you are always listening, always compliment a dress (nevermind that it has been worn several times before, and your opinion will not make the buyer give it back to the shop anyway) or comment favourably on the weight loss at regular intervals. All these might reasonably buy peace. Want to try that with kids? - don’t even think about it.

This happened just the other day - my older one was telling me something about milk as I was reading the newspaper when I responded to him that a bit extra cream in the milk was just fine. Then I forgot all about it. A couple of hours later I noticed that the glass of milk was still lying on the table, totally untouched. I summoned the six year old to enquire about the milk situation and pat came the reply that I was not paying attention to him and was very nonchalant in the way I served the glass of milk. 

In another instance, the whole family was rushing to some social commitment and I didn’t notice that I put out a pair of socks for a pair of blue sneakers and jeans. I didn’t think much about it and later noticed that the boy was ready to go, but without socks. Could not do much but listen to the chiding about lack of colour coordination and how uncool I was to pick those cream coloured (“dumb” as they were called) socks. 

Was I the only dad who was undergoing this? To my relief, I certainly know of a few others - a year ago, at an airport, I heard a little girl ask her dad for a pack of potato wafers of ‘xyz’ flavour. The man, who seemed hassled by many things in reaching the airport went to the stall closeby, picked up a pack of wafers absentmindedly as just then, his office called. He finished his call, paid for the pack and returned ten minutes later just as the boarding was announced. So the family rushed to the gate when the dad passed the bag of wafers to the girl who refused to accept it. 

Suddenly the till then peaceful looking little girl made her displeasure so obvious that the whole waiting area had no choice but to know the cause – the poor dad had picked the ‘abc’ flavour and not ‘xyz.’ The dad tried to reason with her, using a weak argument that they were wafers anyway. The way the scene ended was that the dad went off to get the right flavour and was the last person to board the flight amid much sympathy and understanding from the airline staff and fellow passengers. 

Moral of the story, kids’ interactions with dads is usually after the kids have finished schoolwork, play, TV and listening to some daily advice from mommy dear, so be very aware when you are with them and don’t try to use the same listening tactics of a husband with your little ones.